Whats Up with Life?

Nababaliw ka na talaga, ano? Nagkandarapa ka para sa isang lalaking na hanggang kaibigan lang ang turing sa iyo. Seryoso ka nga ba talaga sa kanya? Umaasa ka ba talaga na mapapaibig mo siya gaya ng pagmamahal mo sa kanya? Kahit nga mga kaibigan mo mismo naiilang sa thought eh. Just the thought of you having a 'crush'(oh what a lame word) on him is enough to be considered weird. What more kung maging kayo pa, diba? Sila na nga mismo ang nagsabi sa iyo na hindi talaga kayo bagay at katawa-tawa kayong tignan kung sakali ngang mangyari ang gusto mo. Ganun na ka-simple yaon.

Yung iba mo namang kaibigan, sabi nila, masbagay pa daw sila ng isa mo pang kaibigan. Nasaktan ka, ano? Alam kong nasaktan ka kahit kaunti. Alam mo kung bakit ka? Dahil totoo yaon. Kung ako nga ang tatanungin, oo nga, masbagay pa sila kaysa kung kayong dalawa. Hindi naman sa papatulan siya ng kaibigan mo o may gusto siya sa kaibigan mo. Sinasabi ko lang, masbagay sila, di ko sinasabi na dapat maging sila o magiging sila na. In denial ka lang talaga kaya hindi mo nakikita yaon - na hindi talaga kayo bagay. Deep down you know I'm right.

Deep down, I know you know that that he will never love you the way you love him. Get real. Pasalamat ka nandirito ako para ihampas ka sa mabagsik na katotohanan. At anong "you can't choose to love" na kalakohang iyan? Huwag mo siyang mahalin, ganoon lang yaon ka-simple. Mahirap ba iyon intindihin? Tignan mo nangyayari sayo ngayon. Padrama-drama ka nalang sa tabi tabi at nagmumuni kung posible ba talaga kayong dalawa. Kawawa ka naman kung sa tingin mong hindi mo siya kayang hindi mahalin.

The process is clearly simple. Just stop thinking about him and fantasizing over such impossibilities between you and him. Yeah, go on and cry if you must, this too shall pass. I honestly do not take you seriously. Your'e highly emotional. I'm sure you'll forget about him just like you've forgotten your past 'crushes' (oh that lame word again). Of course, I understand your need to make poems again about heartaches and of unrequitted love. You'll most probably compose songs and constantly play Chopin's pieces which are in the minor keys just to let all your misery out. In the end, he's just going to be another guy who's inspired your art which later on you'd regret doing for him. I just have to show you your consistent pattern. Reality check: He's just someone who happens to have activated your dopamine secretions in your brain. Don't worry though, you'll get over him soon, trust me.

Hey, don't get mad at me. I'm just showing you your reality. He will never love you. Ever since I could remember, you've always wished and oh-so-hoped that your 'likes' would somehow like you back. And did they? They didn't. Despite your futile attempts, they didn't. And what makes you think that this guy is different from the others? He'n no different. You think he's perfect because you only see what you want to see. Say that you see his imperfections too, but I bet that even his imperfections and flaws seem so perfect for you to balance it out or for you to accept it. Oh c'mon, in a few months time, he'll be a curse to you. Don't you see, everything is just in your mind! You can actualy control your emotions if you always think logically.

I understand your state. You're in a stage where all your hormones are up and brain secretions are highly active.. You'll get over him in about a year or so, which is not so bad, right?

My advice to you is you should just give the thought up and live your life, girl. Its actually a very beautiful one if you stop dwelling on loneliness without him.  Stop the drama and get real.